Crazy
For CowsCrazy
For Cows
Part I : Why Cows Probably Hate Us
There are sites everywhere on the internet that are
dedicated to different things. Star Trek, Video Games, Cars, etc. Cows, however,
should not fall into this list. In fact,
www.crazyforcows.com delivers everything you never wanted to know about
cows, and more.
Usually, when a website opens up with "Moo!", your
expectations of a site should drop to zero. If they don't, tell the dwarf men
from Happyfun Mountain I said "Hi.". Those of you not running off to deliver my
message, please read on.
I discovered crazyforcows.com on one of my many searches for naked midgets in
clown costumes. Why? Do you ask? I don't know. Midgets and clowns have nothing
to do with cows, so I don't know how the site related to my search. Search
engine technology is designed by light beings from NASA and is decades beyond
our pathetic human minds to comprehend. The beings must truly have wanted me to
see this site, bending the laws of the universe to show me to it.
Instantly, upon viewing the site, you can see why it is so
incredibly important. There are many, many things to learn about cows, and most
of them are really gross.
Fun Cow Fact:
A 1,000 pound cow produces an average of 10 tons of manure a year.
Also on the site is listed several stories that readers have
submitted about cows. I don't want to know what kind of sad lonely life that you
have to lead in order to think that a cow related incident is good enough to
write about, submit to a site, and then have it read and pondered over by other
"cow fanatics", but I'll tell you this, we have a phrase for people like that:
Serial Killer.